How To Get Custody Of A Child

Dealing with child custody can be stressful and emotional, especially when you're unsure of the process. Whether you're going through a divorce or trying to get custody as a single parent, knowing how to get custody of a child is crucial. This guide will break down the steps you need to take and the things you should consider to help you get the best outcome for you and your child.

What Is Child Custody in New York?

Child custody in New York is a legal determination focused on ensuring the best possible environment for the child. The primary goal is to make sure that the child’s needs—both emotional and physical—are met in the most effective way. When the court is tasked with deciding who gets custody, they dive deep into several important factors to make the best decision for the child’s well-being.

The Child’s Safety and Emotional Well-Being

One of the first things the court considers is the safety of the child. This includes looking at whether either parent has a history of domestic violence or any other behavior that could put the child at risk. The court will also evaluate the emotional well-being of the child, asking questions like: Will the child feel secure and supported in this environment? Does the parent have a strong, positive relationship with the child? These questions are crucial because the court wants to ensure that the child’s emotional needs are being met and that they are growing up in a loving, nurturing environment.

Stable Environment: What Does It Mean?

A stable environment is one where the child can thrive without constant disruptions or uncertainties. The court looks at whether each parent can provide a consistent home life. This includes assessing the living situation—whether the home is safe, clean, and appropriate for a child. For instance, if one parent moves frequently or lives in an unstable setting, this could impact their chances of gaining custody.

Stability also extends to the child's routine, such as schooling, extracurricular activities, and social life. The court often favors arrangements where the child can continue with their current school and maintain relationships with friends and extended family. This continuity is vital for the child’s sense of security and belonging.

Financial Stability: More Than Just Income

Financial stability is another critical factor. The court doesn’t just look at how much money each parent makes but also considers their ability to manage finances responsibly and provide for the child’s needs. This includes covering basic necessities like food, clothing, and healthcare, as well as being able to afford any special needs the child might have, such as tutoring, therapy, or medical care.

It’s important to note that financial stability alone doesn’t determine custody. A parent who earns less can still be awarded custody if they demonstrate that they can provide a loving, stable environment for the child.

The Parent-Child Relationship: Why It Matters

The relationship between the parent and the child is perhaps one of the most significant factors. The court looks at how involved each parent has been in the child’s life up to this point. This includes everything from attending school events and doctor’s appointments to spending quality time together. A parent who has consistently been there for the child, showing love, guidance, and support, is likely to have an advantage in a custody battle.

The court also considers each parent's willingness to foster a positive relationship between the child and the other parent. If one parent is likely to encourage the child’s relationship with the other parent, this is seen as a positive trait. On the other hand, if a parent is trying to alienate the child from the other parent, it could work against them.

Court Isn’t Always Necessary: Reaching an Agreement

While the court’s involvement might be necessary in some cases, it’s important to understand that getting custody doesn’t always require a court battle. Many parents can reach a custody agreement on their own or through mediation, which can be a more peaceful and cooperative approach. In these cases, parents work together to decide what’s best for their child, often with the help of their attorneys or a mediator.

Reaching an agreement outside of court can have several advantages. It’s usually faster, less expensive, and less stressful than going through a court battle. Plus, it allows both parents to have more control over the outcome, rather than leaving the decision in the hands of a judge.

Putting the Child First

In New York, child custody decisions are all about what’s best for the child. Whether through the court or an amicable agreement, the focus is always on ensuring the child’s safety, emotional well-being, and stability. By understanding the factors that the court considers, parents can better prepare themselves for the custody process and work towards an arrangement that benefits their child the most.

How To Get Custody Of A Child: The Legal Route

Getting custody of your child is a significant and emotional journey, and understanding the legal process is crucial to achieving the best outcome. Custody battles can be complicated, but knowing what to expect can make the process smoother and less stressful. Let’s dive deeper into what each step involves and how you can navigate this path effectively.

Types of Custody: Legal and Physical

Before you even begin the legal process, it's important to understand the two main types of custody: legal and physical.

  • Legal Custody: This type of custody gives you the authority to make major decisions about your child’s life. These decisions can range from where your child will go to school to what type of medical care they will receive, and even how they are raised in terms of religion. Legal custody can be awarded solely to one parent (sole legal custody) or shared between both parents (joint legal custody). When both parents share legal custody, they must work together to make these significant decisions, which can require a lot of communication and cooperation.

  • Physical Custody: Physical custody determines where your child will live. The parent with physical custody is responsible for the day-to-day care and supervision of the child. Just like legal custody, physical custody can be sole or joint. In a joint physical custody arrangement, the child spends substantial time living with both parents, while in a sole physical custody arrangement, the child primarily lives with one parent, and the other may have visitation rights.

Understanding these two types of custody is the first step in knowing what you're aiming for in your case.

Step 1: Gather Your Documents

One of the first things you’ll need to do is gather all the necessary documentation. This paperwork is critical because it helps build your case and provides the court with a clear picture of your relationship with your child. Here’s what you should collect:

  • Child’s Birth Certificate: This is a basic but essential document that proves your relationship to your child.

  • Existing Custody Orders: If there are any prior custody orders or agreements in place, you need to have these on hand. They provide a legal history that the court will consider.

  • Proof of Your Involvement: This could include school records, medical records, or any other documentation that shows your active role in your child’s life. For example, report cards, letters from teachers, or records of doctor visits can all be useful.

  • Financial Records: Showing your financial stability is important, as the court will want to ensure that you can provide for your child. This might include pay stubs, tax returns, or proof of any child support payments.

  • Character References: Letters from people who can attest to your parenting abilities, such as family members, friends, or community members, can strengthen your case.

The more detailed and organized your documentation, the stronger your case will be.

Step 2: File a Custody Petition

After you’ve gathered all the necessary documents, the next step is to file a custody petition. This is the formal way of asking the court for custody of your child. Here’s what you need to know about filing:

  • Where to File: You’ll need to file your petition in the family court of the county where your child currently resides. This is usually where the case will be heard.

  • What to Include: In your petition, you should clearly state your reasons for seeking custody. This includes explaining how living with you would be in the best interest of your child. Be specific—detail your living situation, your relationship with your child, and any other factors that support your case.

  • Custody Types: Specify whether you’re seeking sole or joint custody, both legal and physical, and explain why this arrangement would benefit your child.

Filing a petition is a critical step because it officially starts the legal process. It’s important to be thorough and clear in your petition to ensure the court understands your position.

Step 3: Serve the Other Parent

Once your petition is filed, the next step is to serve the other parent with the custody papers. This is a legal requirement that ensures both parents are aware of the proceedings and have a chance to participate. Here’s how it works:

  • Serving the Papers: Serving means delivering the legal documents to the other parent. This can be done in person, through a process server, or sometimes via mail, depending on the rules of your state.

  • Proof of Service: After the papers are served, you’ll need to file proof of service with the court. This is a document that confirms the other parent has received the papers.

  • Response Time: The other parent typically has a certain amount of time to respond to the petition. This response can either agree to the terms you’ve outlined, suggest different terms, or contest the petition altogether.

Serving the papers is an essential part of the process because it ensures that both parents have an opportunity to be heard.

Step 4: Attend Custody Hearings

After the paperwork is in order, the court will schedule custody hearings. These hearings are where both parents present their cases to the judge. Here’s what you can expect:

  • Presenting Evidence: Each parent will have the opportunity to present evidence that supports their case. This might include documentation, witness testimony, or any other relevant information.

  • Calling Witnesses: You may call witnesses who can speak to your parenting abilities or provide insight into your child’s well-being. These could be teachers, doctors, or even family members.

  • Cross-Examination: During the hearing, each parent (or their attorney) will have the chance to question the other parent’s witnesses. This is a chance to challenge the other parent’s claims and strengthen your own case.

  • Mediation: In some cases, the court may suggest or require mediation—a process where both parents work with a neutral third party to reach an agreement without a judge’s final ruling. Mediation can often lead to a more amicable agreement and is less adversarial than a court battle.

The hearings are a critical part of the process because they allow the judge to hear directly from both parents and make an informed decision.

Step 5: Get the Custody Decision

After all the hearings are complete, the judge will make a decision. This decision is based on what the judge believes is in the best interest of the child. Here’s what happens next:

  • Judge’s Decision: The judge will review all the evidence and testimony presented during the hearings and then issue a custody order. This order will outline the custody arrangement, including whether one parent gets sole custody or if custody is shared (joint custody).

  • Visitation Rights: If one parent is awarded sole physical custody, the other parent will typically be granted visitation rights. These rights might include regular visits, holidays, and vacations.

  • Final Order: Once the judge issues the custody order, it becomes legally binding. Both parents must follow the terms outlined in the order, and failure to do so can result in legal consequences.

The final custody decision is crucial because it determines how your child’s living and decision-making arrangements will be handled moving forward.

Making a Child Custody Agreement Without Going to Court

You don’t always have to go to court to decide on custody. If you and the other parent can communicate well and agree on what’s best for your child, you can make a child custody agreement without court involvement.

Here’s how you can do it:

  1. Agree on the Terms: Both parents need to agree on everything, including legal and physical custody, visitation schedules, and how decisions about the child will be made.

  2. Write It Down: Once you’ve agreed, write everything down in detail. It’s a good idea to have a lawyer review the agreement to make sure it’s legally binding.

  3. Submit It for Approval: Even if you didn’t go to court to reach the agreement, it’s still smart to submit it to the court for approval. This way, the agreement becomes official and can be enforced if needed.

  4. Finalize the Agreement: After the court approves it, the agreement becomes a court order, and both parents have to follow it.

What the Court Considers in Custody Cases

If you’re going through the court to get custody, it’s important to know what the judge will consider. The main focus is always on the child’s best interests, but here are some specific things the court looks at:

  • Parental Fitness: The court will evaluate each parent’s ability to care for the child, including their mental and physical health, lifestyle, and ability to provide a stable home.

  • Child’s Preference: If the child is old enough and mature enough, the court may consider their preference on where they want to live.

  • History of Domestic Violence: Any history of abuse will play a big role in the court’s decision, as the child’s safety is the top priority.

  • Parental Cooperation: The court prefers arrangements where both parents can work together and communicate effectively about their child’s needs.

Navigating Joint Custody

Joint custody is common when both parents are capable of caring for the child. In joint custody, both parents share legal and physical custody, meaning they have to work together to make decisions and split time with their child.

Joint custody can be great for the child, but it does require a lot of cooperation between parents. If you’re considering joint custody, it’s important to set clear guidelines for decision-making and handling disagreements to make the arrangement work smoothly.

Conclusion: How to Get Custody of a Child

Getting custody of your child is a big step, and it can be a tough process. Whether you’re working through the court or trying to reach a child custody agreement without court, it’s important to know your rights and the best way to protect your child’s future. At Krasner Law, we’re here to guide you every step of the way. Our team is experienced in family law and is dedicated to helping you get the best outcome for you and your child.

Ready to take the next step? Contact us today to learn more about how we can help you with your custody case.